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Post by LovelyJune on Jan 4, 2009 8:47:14 GMT -8
Secret exposed: I am obsessed with films. And I'm not talking about things like "I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry" (though i have to admit, that was kinda funny). I'm talking about independent or foreign films. The farther away from Hollywood mindlessness the better. I mostly love indie films because they are FAR MORE realistic than Hollywood stuff. And quite frankly work well therapeutically.
Back when G and I would watch stuff together we always got into the political left stuff: a lot of Michael Moore, documentaries on how Wal-Mart is so shoddily run, etc. But since being single, I've returned to the genre of drama, and one of my favorite things to do is classify these films as acceptable or inspirational for Love Addicts. So...Here's my first review. And if anyone else has movies they'd like to add here...BY ALL MEANS, do.
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Post by LovelyJune on Jan 4, 2009 8:51:57 GMT -8
THE DIVING BELL AND THE BUTTERFLY (subtitled, French) video.movies.go.com/thedivingbellandthebutterfly/main.htmlLast night I watched , THE DIVING BELL AND THE BUTTERFLY, the autobiographical story of Jean-Dominique Bauby, Editor-in-Chief of the French ELLE magazine who had a stroke at the age of 43 which paralyzed him. He was only able to communicate by blinking one eyelid and by doing so, dictated a book that was published a few days before his death in 1997. OUCH! Talk about an incredibly difficult film to watch. I cried throughout the entire film, fearing for my own life, my own sense of freedom and expression. What would I say if I knew I were about to go into a coma? If I were about to be paralyzed? Trapped in my own expressionless, motionless body. How would I feel human, alive, real? Would my children know I loved them? Would I be able to make peace with how far I have come, with how I have lived my life and what I have produced? The thought occurred to me that I can no longer take from the world. It is time to give back. It is time for my own voice. It is time to say something. To make a mark. To help. To heal. To work. It is time for my children to know, without a doubt that they are loved. It is time to produce something other than whiny, dramatic journal entries about my miserable life. Suddenly all the men in my life, in past, seem pointless when faced with the idea the true meaning of existence. I somehow believe that it is no longer right of me to question my existence. It is no longer right of me to be unhappy or worse, ungrateful. To seek answers. There are no answers! That is the answer. Life is about giving. Caring. Loving. Sacrificing. I thought of being alive but unable to communicate. Unable to travel. Unable to love physically. Three things which are so important to me as a woman. Who would I be then? What might my existence mean? I would have hours for thinking. Wondering. Hating myself for all that I did not achieve. I would be faced with the realization that I was done. I didn’t have a second chance. I could not change anything anymore. I could no longer be a productive member of society. I could no longer hug my children. I could no longer tell them I loved them. I could no longer tie their shoes or pack their lunches or lie in bed and read with them. I could no longer scratch their heads or tickle their toes. Oh. I am miserably sad thinking like this. And yet...it forces me to look at the absurdity of what bothers me, what I whine and complain about. Gaining 5 pounds after Christmas? Not getting to the gym? Why G hasn't called yet? The fact that S made a big mistake. WHO CARES! God! Life is so precious. Despite this film being horribly depressing, it is profoundly beautiful and I strongly advise each and every one of you to watch it. It will snap you out of your "poor me" thinking IMMEDIATELY and hopefully lead you to realize how important it is to live your life and take risks and not be afraid of letting go of the bad so as to attain the good in life. It's essential to tell your family that you love them, to put your children first, to give to the poor, to believe in God. Those are what is most important. Who cheated on who? Who's now f'ing who? Who hurt you? Who left you? None of that matters in the end. When everything is taken from you, those are the things that will matter the least.
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Post by LovelyJune on Jan 4, 2009 9:09:14 GMT -8
ALICE (1990, Woody Allen) www.imdb.com/title/tt0099012/What LA can resist a Woody Allen flick when it's so infused with human neurosis and marital discord? In typical Woody Allen-NYC style, "Alice" is the story of a wealthy, Upper Eastside housewife (Mia Farrow) who is at the point in her life where she's questioning her marriage, the sacrifices she made to stay with him and the meaning of her own life. She falls for a dark-haired, good-looking stranger (Joe Mantegna) and has an affair with the help of her Chinese herbalist. Though this movie gets bizarrely unrealistic (as in one of the herbs her doctor gives her makes her invisible), it still tells the age old tale of a woman in her mid-thirties (possibly forties) who is soul searching around the setting of marriage and extramarital affairs. I generally do NOT like or recommend movies about affairs (Get out of your marriage first, then go to town if you want). But this film sends a VERY positive message in the end for those among us who might be struggling with issues of "triangles" or simply doing a little soul searching. Definitely a "safe" film for the single girl, as I know so many of you are ready to vomit at the thought of watching another love story! T
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Post by Sexlessw on Jan 4, 2009 13:04:56 GMT -8
I'll share three films which scream out: LOVE ADDICT:
1. Swann in Love - English, French subtitles, circa 1985. Proust - the ultimate love addict. Best scene, as reinacted from the book - Charles Swann crying at the swank party.
2. Time Regained - French Subtitles. 2000 Proust's last book in "In Search of Lost Time" Best scene: the Narrator & Gilbrete talking about their lost love over tea.
3. The Good Wife - Australian. Bryan Brown, Rachel Ward, Sam Neil. 1986/7. I tell ya, if you're not identifying with Rachel Ward hooking up with Sam Neil and then going into a flipping depression, you're not a Love Addict (ha ha ha)
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Post by Judy on Jan 4, 2009 17:41:45 GMT -8
Hi T - Thanks SO much for the Butterfly review. And more importantly to me, your thoughts on what is really important. I SO agree. ( I can't just "agree", I have to SO agree, the drama queen) Anyway, I am going to try and keep that in mind in '09.
And I am right with you on "there are no answers". My answer is in my recovery from my addictions. It's been 26 years and I am STILL learning. Learning even MORE than at the beginning.
Yup. Look up at the sky. There is a big big world out there.
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Harmony
Junior Member
"Its never too late to become the person you were meant to be"
Posts: 62
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Post by Harmony on Jan 8, 2009 22:53:02 GMT -8
I Loved "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly" So moving, and makes me grateful Im part of the human race.
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Post by nickie on Jan 15, 2009 2:47:09 GMT -8
good thing swann in love had subtitles since i remember quite well i sure couldn't understand their british english. Basileus Quartet is the foreign film i recommend but look out, if anyone has incest issues as a flash point then be sure to avoid this movie. since i don't, i loved it. it's not inspiring it's just artistic, musical and cheers me up because it depicts something worse then my life.
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Post by Judy on Jan 15, 2009 11:09:54 GMT -8
I think the movie that affected (effected?) me the most with regard to my love addiction was the HBO movie starring Annette Benning and Ben Kingsley about the Dr. Tarnower murder. He was the fellow who wrote a famous diet book, and Mrs. Harris (Annette) was his lover. Amazing movie.
A smart, accomplished, beautiful woman and what she goes through and what she settles for and how she unravels due to love addiction (and drug addiction). I"ve watche it twice - both times before I found this site. I just sat there saying "That's me. That's me."
Catch it if you can.
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