Post by hexa on Nov 23, 2011 0:48:29 GMT -8
almost every time i read about something negative psychologically, it is always usually blamed on the parents.
this has always troubled me, because despite my issues with self worth and esteem, i had amazing parents. they were supportive in what i enjoyed doing, encouraging and gave praise without overdoing it.
but as i think back, i remember that even as a very young child, i always had a hard time accepting praise from my parents. it made me feel shy and embarrassed. i remember a song my mom used to sing when she was proud of me, and i would cover my ears and feel very embarrassed. i had a belief that my parent's praise and acceptance of what i did was something to be taken for granted....since i had a healthy family, i believed that the praise that came from my parents didn't matter, because they would say these things no matter what because they are my parents. so i never accepted it for the majority of my childhood. i also had a hard time showing my talents around my parents, or practicing anything in front of them. i took piano lessons, but i was only comfortable practicing alone, and couldnt perform in front of them, because it gave me anxiety.....so they stopped paying for the lessons because they thought i never practiced.
i dont get where this came from? it seems to have developed on my own, and i cant blame anyone. i took my healthy family for granted and it affected me.
i get high off praise from people i look up to......if it is a person from whom the praise needs to be earned and worked hard for, i love to prove my worthiness to such people. i don't know why i feel this way, or why i can't be satified with praise from people who i feel like its easy to get from. or why i can't even praise my own self very often.
what are your thoughts on praise?
this has always troubled me, because despite my issues with self worth and esteem, i had amazing parents. they were supportive in what i enjoyed doing, encouraging and gave praise without overdoing it.
but as i think back, i remember that even as a very young child, i always had a hard time accepting praise from my parents. it made me feel shy and embarrassed. i remember a song my mom used to sing when she was proud of me, and i would cover my ears and feel very embarrassed. i had a belief that my parent's praise and acceptance of what i did was something to be taken for granted....since i had a healthy family, i believed that the praise that came from my parents didn't matter, because they would say these things no matter what because they are my parents. so i never accepted it for the majority of my childhood. i also had a hard time showing my talents around my parents, or practicing anything in front of them. i took piano lessons, but i was only comfortable practicing alone, and couldnt perform in front of them, because it gave me anxiety.....so they stopped paying for the lessons because they thought i never practiced.
i dont get where this came from? it seems to have developed on my own, and i cant blame anyone. i took my healthy family for granted and it affected me.
i get high off praise from people i look up to......if it is a person from whom the praise needs to be earned and worked hard for, i love to prove my worthiness to such people. i don't know why i feel this way, or why i can't be satified with praise from people who i feel like its easy to get from. or why i can't even praise my own self very often.
what are your thoughts on praise?