Post by Susan Peabody on Jun 24, 2009 13:37:33 GMT -8
Page 449, 3rd edition of Alcoholics Anonymous. And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation—some fact of my life—unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God’s world by mistake. Until I could accept my [situation] I could not be [at peace]. Unless I accept life completely on life’s terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.
acceptance. i have posted a few things about my ex POA today but i feel as if I'm much more detached from him than I used to be. I've accepted that this affair- mostly in the virtual world but for one night in the physical world- was wrong. accepting that the only way I can live with the remorse is by seeing I'm not perfect. i've always wanted to be perfect. set my standards too high all my life so there were loads of disappointments over the years. accepting that I have high moral standards that I cannot and will not lower ever again. not for anything. not for anyone. but accepting that not everyone is like me and so I have no right to judge them. that's why I can let my POA go. I dont need to change him. that's no longer my mission. but I cannot change me either because that would be going against my nature. we are totally incompatible and I can let go of the dream. so simple. so obvious.
and i can let go of all the anger and frustration I've felt inside for all these months. my husband said sthg unacceptable today but rather than getting angry or starting an argument over it, I took a deep breath, said that he had a point and that next time we would think more carefully before making decisions so rashly. i was able not to snap at him for the first time in months. think I'm making headway at long last. thank you God. thank you forum