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Post by Susan Peabody on Sept 26, 2012 9:27:24 GMT -8
I have said this before. Self-pity is not a good substitute for self-love.
Self-pity in early childhood make sense; we have no power. As an adult we usually make choices that put us in the place of victim; natural disasters excepted.
Self-Pity is addictive. I was addicted to self-pity at first because I had a horrible childhood, but later I grew fond of self-pity and began making poor choices just to get a fix.
If you do feel sorry for yourself, do not get stuck there.
At some point in my recovery I stopped using the word self-pity and substituted "appropriate self-concern."
Self-pity not only progresses like all addictions, it can change forms and become anger and what we call a persecution complex.
The anecdote for toxic self-pity is positive thinking. After something bad has happened make a gratitude list or a list of affirmations.
This too shall pass . . . I am not going to let this ruin my day.
Like gratitude, self-pity is a choice.
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Post by Loving My Life on May 15, 2013 15:10:32 GMT -8
Becoming aware of our actions will help us in our recover. I know when I first started on this journey, I had all of these character defects, and it was hard sometimes to admit it, and it was hard to grow up and take responsibility for myself. But I had too if I was going to be healthy.
From Susan . . . This is called the "observing ego."
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