lucidity and presentness

i had a lot of anxiety about going to my aunt's today, as i always do, because in the past i've always left really depressed because of the amount of attention they give to my sister (and not to me). today, i did not fantasize while i was here and i kept myself from self-pitying and i actually had a really good time even when i didn't get all of the attention. i'm really happy i came and i realized i don't need to talk about me to feel okay and accepted and have fun.