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Post by Susan Peabody on Jul 13, 2015 10:21:53 GMT -8
If you find it difficult to build up your self-esteem it may because you are dealing with a deeper issue. This includes: Toxic Shame Self-Hatred [anger] Self-Loathing [aversion] Self-Denial Self-Alienation Addiction to Others [split self/object oriented: Borderline Personality Disorder] Once you deal with these deeper issues you can use cognitive behavioral therapy to start building your self-esteem. The things to do are listed in my article about self-esteem on this board and in all of my books. When the crying stops the splitting begins.

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Post by loveellen on Jul 22, 2015 17:12:23 GMT -8
love this , thank you ,susan !
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Post by maureenjackson on Oct 13, 2016 23:11:33 GMT -8
Completely Agree with the post.
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Post by moonlitvein on Aug 31, 2017 11:22:09 GMT -8
If you find it difficult to build up your self-esteem it may because you are dealing with a deeper issue. This includes: Self-Hatred [anger] Self-Loathing [aversion] Can you please explain the two factors above that you talk about. I am extremely angry most of the time and have gone back to the tendency of being self critical as well as throwing my anger on others.
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Post by Susan Peabody on Aug 31, 2017 17:52:52 GMT -8
This article by Susan P. explains the angry inner adolescent introduced by Susan Anderson as the Outer Child. She is our gatekeeper. She keeps out people who will hurt us. She was created to protect the wounded Inner Child who is vulnerable. My Outer Child is named Gretchen and she is always there for Susie my Inner Childe. The Outer Child comes out when we are abandoned by our PoA and it means we are ready to move on. Sometimes our Outer Child takes over our life and we have to keep on eye on her. She is useful to protect her but she can also push healthy people away. We should love her as much as our Inner Child but not let her run the whole show. Moderation is all things. www.brightertomorrow.net/OUTER%20CHILD%20ARTICLE.pdf
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Post by eun123 on May 3, 2022 14:16:03 GMT -8
I feel (after reading the article by the link) it is saying our childhood is got to do with our current state. Therefore the inner children work to uncover the unconscious.... Let me know if I read it wrong and if you can expand on it
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Post by Susan Peabody on May 3, 2022 16:54:26 GMT -8
All addictions, including love addiction, started out as a coping mechanism that has now turned into a problem. What are we coping with? Childhood trauma is the culprit. There are many ways to heal from childhood trauma as we point out on our Adult Children meeting adultchildren.us/ My favorite way to heal is transactional analysis or inner child work. We have a whole sub board about this. Here is the link. loveaddictsanonymous.boards.net/board/14/inner-child-corner
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