I am feeling very hyper, and I don't know what to with myself . I keep spending money , I'd rather save. I got new hairstyle , I am bying more healthy food . I haven't done any DIY this week, and the man is waiting for me to cofirm carpet fitting day.
I am tired, and haven't had decent sleep for a long time. I go to bed 1am , -4am 5 am was a record last week.
I cannot say I am unhappy , I am and I am very grateful for All the recovery path , networks and literature !! I am greatfull for HP and I am trying to do things is way.
I got an attention from someone , I ignore if. Other woman , while we were chatting about DIY , mentioned this man ( started to giggle ), I said what's that about . She said to put as together . I said I don't need a man and I only want help with things I struggle . Now I feel overwhelmed , I do not trust myself enough to say No. I clearly remember my first though before meeting POA , this man clearly has an anger issues . No way I ll get with him. And I just did. Anger is what attracts me . And other not healthy addictions .
I feel overwhelmed because in the morning I did not wanted to stay alone at home. The attention is so tempting. I was scared so I just went out: shops, hairdressers, school just not to be at home.
But he lives 5 min away and addiction is sooo strong, plus guy at work remind me of him ( facial features).
I am physically ex costed , it's like adrenalin pumping.. But I haven't drank coffee or any energy drinks .. Only water milk and tea .