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Post by Susan Peabody on Feb 11, 2021 8:33:50 GMT -8
Love addicts often have a hard time on Valentine's Day, especially if they are in withdrawal. Please share your feeling on this thread. Over the years I have been sad, lonely, and finally free of the sentiment attached to this day. |
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Post by havefaith on Feb 11, 2021 18:16:32 GMT -8
God is my ‘soul mate’ - loves me unconditionally and eternally and wills only the best for me. Doesn’t get any better than that on Valentine’s Day - or any day, for that matter!
HaveFaith
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Post by lotusfire on Feb 12, 2021 6:40:49 GMT -8
I was ignoring Valentines until last night when my therapist texted me some reminders to avoid self sabotage. Now I’m upset and realizing this is my first V day without my husband and he will be celebrating with someone else. I’m Mad and jealous and crazed. Again logically I don’t want him back. Emotionally my love Addict part is screaming constantly. I’m tired of all the intrusive thoughts - I just want to heal and move on with the life I deserve.
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RoseNadler
Moderator
Newcomer Greeter & Moderator
Posts: 1,068
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Post by RoseNadler on Feb 12, 2021 8:05:26 GMT -8
I was ignoring Valentines until last night when my therapist texted me some reminders to avoid self sabotage. Now I’m upset and realizing this is my first V day without my husband and he will be celebrating with someone else. I’m Mad and jealous and crazed. Again logically I don’t want him back. Emotionally my love Addict part is screaming constantly. I’m tired of all the intrusive thoughts - I just want to heal and move on with the life I deserve. Can you find a way to love yourself on V Day? What makes you feel loved and cared for? Can you do something like that for yourself? |
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Post by Susan Peabody on Feb 12, 2021 11:34:44 GMT -8
God is my ‘soul mate’ - loves me unconditionally and eternally and wills only the best for me. Doesn’t get any better than that on Valentine’s Day - or any day, for that matter! HaveFaith |
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Post by lotusfire on Feb 12, 2021 15:24:26 GMT -8
No idea how to reply to a post. Sorry:-). Format is new to me. So I decided to treat myself to a massage tomorrow. And I took a half day off work to do some fun shopping with my mom and lunch.
I’m reading a book called A Spirituality of Wholeness. The New look at Grace. I really don’t treat myself nicely. I treat my kids and friends better. So I’m going to make a conscious effort to be kinder and gentler with myself. ❤️ It’s so hard. 🤗
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Post by Linda S. on Feb 12, 2021 15:39:53 GMT -8
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Post by sexlessw on Feb 13, 2021 4:31:38 GMT -8
LotusFire:
Now that's THE WAY to celebrate Valentine's Day. All about the SELF love and SELF care. Make yourself NUMBER ONE. I'm liking what you will be doing.
I look at Valentine's Day as a corporate construct. Another way for the corporate world to take as much $$$ out of our pockets as possible.
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Post by jennymae on Feb 13, 2021 6:55:42 GMT -8
Self-love day for me today... enjoying time to read, write, take a bath with amazing salt crystals and chakra balancing music. I'll also cook a Blue Apron meal for myself and my son. I love getting the food delivered to my house with recipes and excellent healthy ingredients with no thought needed on my part. I get to lose myself in the experience. Planned a ski trip last night with two amazing female friends for this week. Doing some proactive self-love acts. Also, said no to my mother last night when she said she would be in the area and was coming over to visit. I knew I needed this day to myself. She pushed for a yes, I said yes, and then asked my inner wisdom as I felt myself getting angry. I called her back and said I know I need this day for myself. Giving myself permission to make a choice today that feels good. Giving myself permission to and time for my inner child to feel some feelings in a safe way.
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RoseNadler
Moderator
Newcomer Greeter & Moderator
Posts: 1,068
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Post by RoseNadler on Feb 13, 2021 21:37:21 GMT -8
Just saw this on Twitter:
Valentine’s Day reminders:
1. Just because you’re single doesn’t mean you’re unworthy of being taken
2. And being single isn’t inferior to being taken
3. But you’re also allowed to be disappointed that you’re single
(@shiraisinspired)
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Post by Linda S. on Feb 14, 2021 4:26:22 GMT -8
Sorry this is so big, I don't know how to make it smaller, but maybe I need a BIG reminder.  |
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Post by lotusfire on Feb 14, 2021 8:05:36 GMT -8
I had some heavy meditation last night. I realize that I have power within me and I always have. It really freed some of my withdrawals. I also realize there are many forms of love - I love my kids my family and friends. I love smells and small wonders. I will always love the father of my kids but I don’t have to feel bad for not loving him as my husband. I did. I don’t anymore. And I think I’m okay with that finally. I hope I remember this next time I spiral - but for today, I am enjoying remembering different types of love and not focused on romantic love. There is a lot less pressure too. ❤️❤️
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terra
Full Member
Posts: 165
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Post by terra on Feb 14, 2021 16:33:59 GMT -8
Well,
I felt anxious this morning. I was by myself for a change: my kid was picked up by her friend on Friday who lives an hour away. Will be picking her up tomorrow.
But my anxiety is money/ procrastination related.
It restarted when frigid temp moved in and it is brutally cold in Midwest.
I sat down and worked on my own taxes: Turbotax has a free edition if you fall under a certain income category.
I crunched down numbers, filed federal and got a text that it was accepted.
Felt immediately better.
Now working on someone else's. It certainly feels like if I have something undone from last week or so, it bugs me.
I am wondering if this is a side effect from LA or ...?
It appears that my self-esteem is directly tied up to my productivity.
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Post by powerless on Feb 15, 2021 1:09:37 GMT -8
I am about 3 weeks out from having found out my new love interest was married, a fact he not only didn't voluntarily tell me, but also concealed when I asked. I ended it immediately, but that doesn't mean it didn't hurt, and I'm still obsessing. I'm surprised how well I've handled Valentine's Day. I've only have very minor obtrusive thoughts of he and his wife having a wonderful romantic love and sex filled day while I'm all alone feeling disposable. I did steps 1-9 on this problem, and it helped. I'm really doing a lot better than I thought I would be today. Thanks for all the posts. And thank you Susan for opening up this topic today.
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