I am trying to understand the love addiction. I'm married, and Christian, but even though I was set free from pornography and masturbation, I have discovered that I'm still in need of healing in this area of my life. For example, online, I tried to help a suicidal women about a year ago, and we were talking daily and I developed fealings for her. A few months before that, I was helping a female co-worker and she started to flirt with me and I admit to flirting back. This developed some kind of connection. Both relationships are now ended. The online women, I longer contact and told my wife. It hurt my wife a lot that I did that. The other co-worker one, I don't talk to her in that way but only about work and occasionally light friendly talk, not as the talk before. This is why I feel that I was interested in the SLAA.
I used to attend 12 Step AA and SA meetings and am familiar with the AABB and SAWB and also purchased Kindle SLAA since I thought I was losing my mind. I only read chapter 1 and 2. That is where I am right now. I am "feeling" ok now but I know where trusting my feelings got me.
I am most comfortable with a man helping me. I honestly will be triggers if a women tries to help me. I am triggered when I talk to women online to be honest. It's not always a lust encounter but that is who I am basically. Thank you for listening to me.
Post by Susan Peabody on Oct 17, 2022 9:19:20 GMT -8
Welcome. Sex addiction is just another coping mechanism for underlying issues. Many sex addicts find out that love addiction is the real problem in their life and sex was just a distraction. This is why I started LAA to focus on the primary issue which is estrangement from self and from our Higher Power. As infants, our primary needs are for nourishment and love. If we don't get enough love, we develop an attachment disorder that as adults becomes attachment dysregulation or love addiction. You are in the right place. Keep coming back.