|
Post by Susan Peabody on Oct 18, 2022 12:16:24 GMT -8
Torchbeares are lovers at heart. We enjoy being in love, so we always love somebody either from the past, present, or future. This not only gets us high off love, but it distracts us from painful emotions that keep coming up. Recovery is hard for us because we are really hooked on the feelings of love even when they are painful. Our only hope is to transfer our need for love on to our Higher Power.
In high school I was obsessed with David. I was miserable. Twenty years later I could not wait to go to the high school reunion to see David. As soon as he came into the room, I started projecting an image of him left over from high school. We started dating. It took three months for me to stop projecting on to him and face the fact that he was drunk, high off cocaine, and a real mess. I had just started a Women Who Love Too Much meeting and I realized I had to walk away. Today, I still cannot believe I walked away from the love of my life. But it did raise my self-esteem and self-respect.
Today, I am still a torchbearer, but it is love for my Higher Power. Those I loved in the past just bring on nostalgia. I do not obsess on human beings anymore. I have friends and everything I need to be happy, joyous and free.
|
|