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Post by Susan Peabody on Mar 13, 2009 7:32:02 GMT -8
I mentioned earlier, there’s another obstacle to change that most people don’t think about--the guilt and shame we feel for hurting others. We get so caught up in these feelings that we lack the motivation to move on. Many people can’t even get started because of this burden. Fortunately, there is a solution to this age-old problem--forgiving ourselves.
To begin forgiving yourself, it’s important to accept the fact that you’re not perfect. Embrace your humanity and the fact that you make mistakes. The resulting humility is necessary for change.
Another way to forgive yourself is the time-honored ritual of making amends. In 12-step programs this process is involved in both the eighth and ninth steps.
Please note that making amends means more than just an apology. If you’re rude to someone in the grocery store, maybe saying you’re sorry is enough, but it you are rude to a friend all the time, making amends means offering your friend a new relationship--one in which she or he is no longer being hurt.
If you have some serious amends to make, for what 12-step programs call “wreckage of the past,” making them will be harder than you think and won’t always take the course you want or expect. Still, it must be done if you are to change.
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Post by cheri on Mar 13, 2009 22:47:16 GMT -8
Thanks Susan
Forgiveness is no easier than leave unhealth relationship. It calls same courage...
However, this might be necessary for completion of one chapter and begin of new.
I start to send the intention to universe and allow forgiveness come at divine time...
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