Post by Susan Peabody on Apr 12, 2009 14:11:56 GMT -8
For a torchbearer progress is getting a crush and being able to starve the limerence through no contact. I used to carry a torch for up to 20 years and now a few months after an infatuation and NC I am free. This is progress for me. I am thrilled.
Progress is that this month I didn't have the dreadful longing and obsession and yearning for contact come back that has haunted me at the end of my cycle for the last 2 years.
I cried and I felt sad and had some obsessive thoughts, but the difference is marked. I came to this site because I was still obsessed with my POA after 2 years of recovery and NC (bar a few slips via calls, but no actual contact)
The only thing that is different is coming here and posting and also finding out about the idea of a phantom lover. So am very grateful to this site and Susan's information here. Thank you. Primrose.
Only the ego can struggle, the soul lives in ease and joy.
Progress is making a commitment to myself to not fantasize. Progress is getting on this board a reading so I can understand my addiction and heal. Progress is knowing that I keep having failed relationships because I tend to fantasize and make people into something their not. Progress is learning that the reason I do this is to avoid pain.