Post by lacypooh on Sept 7, 2010 15:46:21 GMT -8
About a month ago ( after the latest heart break w/ an unavailable man) i decided i had to change.
I have tried to focus on myself before but always wound up back focused on men. During this time i discovered a horrible problem, [b]it has been hard for me to let God in on this area of my life, which is weird because i have always had a relationship with him.
I know it is distortion & isn't true. I never surrended myself fully in this area because it was hard to loose my grip of control on any romantic situation.
But one night in a sleepless fit of depression I begged God to help me. I poured out my guts before him & slowly he began to reveal to me that love had become my idol. While curled into the fetal position, I asked 4 forgiviness & begged him yet again to help me overcome. I cried so hard i couldn't breath, i thought for sure i was going to sufficate on my own tears.
Since then it has gotten easier for me to open up w/ God about my fears and concerns in this area. He then directed me to a self esteem book in my office that i bought years ago. I've been doing the exercises & avoiding dating since July , then 2 days ago he revealed "love addiction" 2 me through a show I've already seen b4 , but this time I felt conviction as i watched a model discuss her pains, i got on the internet & he led me to this site.
The point of this long story is that i know i could never have gotgten here without his help & intervention. It is still very scary but i know that there is hope for me. I look forward to my complete healing & restoration & thank all of you who post to this site.
I have tried to focus on myself before but always wound up back focused on men. During this time i discovered a horrible problem, [b]it has been hard for me to let God in on this area of my life, which is weird because i have always had a relationship with him.
I know it is distortion & isn't true. I never surrended myself fully in this area because it was hard to loose my grip of control on any romantic situation.
But one night in a sleepless fit of depression I begged God to help me. I poured out my guts before him & slowly he began to reveal to me that love had become my idol. While curled into the fetal position, I asked 4 forgiviness & begged him yet again to help me overcome. I cried so hard i couldn't breath, i thought for sure i was going to sufficate on my own tears.
Since then it has gotten easier for me to open up w/ God about my fears and concerns in this area. He then directed me to a self esteem book in my office that i bought years ago. I've been doing the exercises & avoiding dating since July , then 2 days ago he revealed "love addiction" 2 me through a show I've already seen b4 , but this time I felt conviction as i watched a model discuss her pains, i got on the internet & he led me to this site.
The point of this long story is that i know i could never have gotgten here without his help & intervention. It is still very scary but i know that there is hope for me. I look forward to my complete healing & restoration & thank all of you who post to this site.
