Post by LovelyJune on Mar 3, 2010 16:04:27 GMT -8
If I were to take a group of love addicts and throw them in a room together I'm probably going to find certain characteristics and similarities. Yes, yes, yes...these characteristics are written about in books by Susan Peabody and Pia Mellody etc. Love addicts are needy, they fall in love too quickly, they're afraid of being alone, they're avoidants of themselves, blah, blah, blah. I think by now we all have a pretty good idea of the textbook definition of love addict.
But I'm not so sure I've ever come across a book that defines our positive traits, so I decided to list them here lest we never forget that every human being has both good and bad within...
Tell me if I am way off the mark but I'm going to venture to say that MOST (but not all) Love Addicts have the following wonderful qualities:
-We are helpful (albeit sometimes to the point of getting too involved in others' lives, but helpful nonetheless!)
-We are generally humble people (I guess the flip side of this is low-self-esteem?)
-We want to do good for others, despite being needy ourselves.
-We are forgiving (how could we not be? We keep going back for abuse!)
-We are strong (Hello! How many times has our heart been broken and we get up and do it all over again!)
-We are hopeful
-We are extremely quick thinking and able in times of crisis (love addicts are used to adversity, so when others fall a part in crisis, we kick in and do fine!)
-Many of us, because we are drawn to drama and thrive on it, are colorful, dramatic people ourselves whose families and friends might reap great amounts of entertainment and happiness from us -- when we're happy.
-We are pleasers. I don't care if I am fully recovered, I still love pleasing others.
-We are adaptable, even in extreme situations. We may not like change, at first, but it anyone can change, a love addict can!
-We have defense mechanisms that work, and have helped us to be strong and survive great hardship and suffering.
-We are survivors, we can handle this.
-We are resourceful, at least the ones reading these boards!
-We are not afraid of failure (we know failure; but some of us may be afraid of success)
Don't forget your positive qualities today! And add more here if I missed some.
T
But I'm not so sure I've ever come across a book that defines our positive traits, so I decided to list them here lest we never forget that every human being has both good and bad within...
Tell me if I am way off the mark but I'm going to venture to say that MOST (but not all) Love Addicts have the following wonderful qualities:
-We are helpful (albeit sometimes to the point of getting too involved in others' lives, but helpful nonetheless!)
-We are generally humble people (I guess the flip side of this is low-self-esteem?)
-We want to do good for others, despite being needy ourselves.
-We are forgiving (how could we not be? We keep going back for abuse!)
-We are strong (Hello! How many times has our heart been broken and we get up and do it all over again!)
-We are hopeful
-We are extremely quick thinking and able in times of crisis (love addicts are used to adversity, so when others fall a part in crisis, we kick in and do fine!)
-Many of us, because we are drawn to drama and thrive on it, are colorful, dramatic people ourselves whose families and friends might reap great amounts of entertainment and happiness from us -- when we're happy.
-We are pleasers. I don't care if I am fully recovered, I still love pleasing others.
-We are adaptable, even in extreme situations. We may not like change, at first, but it anyone can change, a love addict can!
-We have defense mechanisms that work, and have helped us to be strong and survive great hardship and suffering.
-We are survivors, we can handle this.
-We are resourceful, at least the ones reading these boards!
-We are not afraid of failure (we know failure; but some of us may be afraid of success)
Don't forget your positive qualities today! And add more here if I missed some.
T
