Post by Rainbows Always on Dec 18, 2007 2:48:18 GMT -8
Today I was touched by Gods Grace.
This hasnt really got anything to do with love addiction as such...but illustrates that the 12 steps does work (in my life anyway)..Last night I couldnt sleep. I was thinking about a lot of spiritual stuff that needed to be done in my life (this all came up after I'd done some step work). So I got out of bed and sat on the couch.
Ive been challenged all year with a very rebellious pre-teen daughter who is giving me a hard time and she's only 10. I so want to be a good mum but her constant rebellion is a little more than I can cope with at the moment. (im a single parent AND an addict!!). Once I start working on my co-dep issues and do some boundary work I know it will be easier for me. I feel like the blind leading the blind. I have no role models. All I know how to do is what my parents did with me and I know I DONT WANT TO DO THAT.
Anyway where was I, oh on the couch. I cried and sobbed and then I started to pray. I asked God to help me be a better mum. Help me to "know what to do" with my child.
Exhausted I went to bed.
This morning I got up, felt down as she was rude and had an attitude first thing. I took a few deep breaths. then when she went out I picked up a parenting CD on raising teenagers that has sat on my desk for 1 year.
I wasnt in a hurry to listen to it as she is only 10. I thought, "ive got plenty of time, about 3 years"
But today I decided to listen to it, (I think my HP gave me a nudge) as I felt so defeated. The CD was amazing, there is also a sequel. A man called Graham did the CD and was brilliant. He's worked with teenages for 30 yrs, is a minister and an expert by the sounds of it. I really heard what I needed to hear.
I think I need a councillor I thought to myself, coz I have a few questions that I need to ask someone.
Anyway I rang up the number on the CD case to order the new CD. I cant really afford such luxury as it is VERY expensive, but I did it anyway. (the 12 step programme teaches us that "economic insecuirty will fade away")
So I called up to enquire and the man on the phone said "Hello, Graham speaking".
Can you imagine my suprise. I said, "What Graham, Graham. ??Graham on the CD Graham??." He laughed and we chatted for about 15 minutes (he never answers the phone but was just walking by at the moment I called).
Now I dont always know if I believe in a Higher Power. Its all new to me. But that there was definetly a "God job". I know my Higher Power was working with me today.
I felt happy and positive. Graham (the speaker) was amazing and gave me some great (free) advise and I got off the phone feeling so empowered.
I dont ever get positive feedback from my family about my parenting. (I work bloomin' hard at it). To be validated by a total stranger was truly a blessing.
That was a small miracle.
shaz
This hasnt really got anything to do with love addiction as such...but illustrates that the 12 steps does work (in my life anyway)..Last night I couldnt sleep. I was thinking about a lot of spiritual stuff that needed to be done in my life (this all came up after I'd done some step work). So I got out of bed and sat on the couch.
Ive been challenged all year with a very rebellious pre-teen daughter who is giving me a hard time and she's only 10. I so want to be a good mum but her constant rebellion is a little more than I can cope with at the moment. (im a single parent AND an addict!!). Once I start working on my co-dep issues and do some boundary work I know it will be easier for me. I feel like the blind leading the blind. I have no role models. All I know how to do is what my parents did with me and I know I DONT WANT TO DO THAT.
Anyway where was I, oh on the couch. I cried and sobbed and then I started to pray. I asked God to help me be a better mum. Help me to "know what to do" with my child.
Exhausted I went to bed.
This morning I got up, felt down as she was rude and had an attitude first thing. I took a few deep breaths. then when she went out I picked up a parenting CD on raising teenagers that has sat on my desk for 1 year.
I wasnt in a hurry to listen to it as she is only 10. I thought, "ive got plenty of time, about 3 years"
But today I decided to listen to it, (I think my HP gave me a nudge) as I felt so defeated. The CD was amazing, there is also a sequel. A man called Graham did the CD and was brilliant. He's worked with teenages for 30 yrs, is a minister and an expert by the sounds of it. I really heard what I needed to hear.
I think I need a councillor I thought to myself, coz I have a few questions that I need to ask someone.
Anyway I rang up the number on the CD case to order the new CD. I cant really afford such luxury as it is VERY expensive, but I did it anyway. (the 12 step programme teaches us that "economic insecuirty will fade away")
So I called up to enquire and the man on the phone said "Hello, Graham speaking".
Can you imagine my suprise. I said, "What Graham, Graham. ??Graham on the CD Graham??." He laughed and we chatted for about 15 minutes (he never answers the phone but was just walking by at the moment I called).
Now I dont always know if I believe in a Higher Power. Its all new to me. But that there was definetly a "God job". I know my Higher Power was working with me today.
I felt happy and positive. Graham (the speaker) was amazing and gave me some great (free) advise and I got off the phone feeling so empowered.
I dont ever get positive feedback from my family about my parenting. (I work bloomin' hard at it). To be validated by a total stranger was truly a blessing.
That was a small miracle.
shaz