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Post by gypsysoul on Jun 1, 2012 15:52:21 GMT -8
Today my therapist told me she thinks the best treatment for me is for us to do "parts work." I'd never heard the term, she explained about traumas and different "parts" are created (not full blown personalities, but a bit along those lines) and these parts get stuck at the point of trauma and until they're dealt with, they can wreck havoc with us.
This came about from my saying I felt that, intellectually, I'm a full blown adult, with a good grasp of reality and logic, knowing right from wrong, etc, etc. However, EMOTIONALLY, I'm barely a teen...and one w/ poor impulse control at times, and with some very self-destructive (emotionally) urges.
It seems to me I've had this "gap" most of my life, but it's getting much worse as the "intellectual" side has continued to grow and mature and the "emotional" side remains...frozen, playing some twisted "script" over and over and over, each time desperately trying to have it turn out differently....
Has anyone here done this "parts" therapy? Has it been helpful?
Thanks!
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Post by Havefaith on Jun 1, 2012 18:53:24 GMT -8
I'm doing therapy work that is strikingly similar, though we haven't put a name to it.
I also am very adult-like in the majority of areas in life -- gainfully employed, parent of two great children, active and healthy social life, loving family member, even married 26 years to a healthy, loving husband. HOWEVER -- I am about 15 years old emotionally, when it comes to love/relationships. Hence, I've acted out most of my married life.
Intense therapy and deep inner child (for me, teen) work has been SO helpful. It is helping me to 'defrost' those thought patterns that have been frozen in my psyche for 35+ years. There is still a lot of defrosting to do, lol.
HaveFaith
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Post by bklynrn on Jun 2, 2012 4:15:17 GMT -8
Hi Gypsysoul,
I have not heard of that specific type of therapy but the process makes sense. It sounds like Inner child type of work and trauma based recovery work..
I have also been doing something similar to that. I can now FEEL my areas of being stuck. I functioned fine at work, school , with friends and raising my son but in certain interpersonal areas I felt emotionally stuck and unauthentic most times. Sometimes impulsive under certain triggers BUT since I brought these immature emotional PARTS into my awareness and can now FEEL the emotions around it ,I'm now able to work with it on a conscious level. I started to heal it and bring new neural pathways with new information into my nervous system. It's a way of integrating myself with the new ways of seeing and feeling old information. Old information that I was not aware of but it was being projected into certain areas of the here and now. Does that make sense? It was very important to bring these faulty parts into my awareness to feel the emotions about it. Not just intellectualize it. To feel, heal and process it in a new way.
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Post by gypsysoul on Jun 2, 2012 5:18:50 GMT -8
Thanks for the info HaveFaith and Bklynrn.
She might be on the right track. The problem I have w/ this is she mentioned 2 "points of trauma" that she has identified (based on the history taking done initially.) BUT...I have ZERO emotions surrounding those events. The one took place when I was 5 and I really have no personal recollection, only family stories. The other when I was 12, but again though I recall this one, there is nothing there when I tell it. These events were sort of imposed upon me by outside circumstances...not "personal" meaning not aimed at me specifically. Sort of like if you'd been in the Twin Towers, but were one of the physically unharmed survivors.
I, also, have functioned fine in many areas...I've remained employed, raised 2 kids by myself, kept a roof over everyone's head and food on the table, am a home and pet owner, etc. But, always, there has been this intellect/emotion gap inside me, and the scary part is...the emotional one is growing to be the stronger, the one "in charge," so that over the past 3 yrs, gradually, my functionality is becoming more impaired in areas outside interpersonal relationships (where it had the bulk of the impact, in previous yrs.)
I hope this works, I really do. I'm prepared to try just about anything at this point.
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Post by bklynrn on Jun 2, 2012 7:03:07 GMT -8
Gypsysoul,
Sometimes it's VERY difficult to tap into the emotions around an event--especially when you're trying to tap into childhood emotions. Children are pretty resilient and it sounds like you have learned very well how to survive those traumatic events by numbing the emotions. That's ok and just be patient with yourself. Don't rush it...How can that child in you feel any feelings when she was needing to survive. Hang in there cause sometimes as old blocked emotions are coming into the here and now ,we tend to want to go back to old ways of coping and being. I had zero emotions about so much of my past BUT it was being played out in the arena of my current life--but i didn't know it. It takes patience and time to get to the core of this type of work.
Keep in mind that this is a process and it's filled with up's and down's and sometimes--not so pleasant feelings but the outcomes are so worth it. I have a much better perspective on life now though I still have some work to do but I'm looking forward to what it brings up in me.
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Post by sunflwrs4evr on Jun 2, 2012 8:10:04 GMT -8
gypsysoul....its great you are trying hard to tap into your inner child..... and i like how bklyrnr...explained it..."Children are pretty resilient and it sounds like you have learned very well how to survive those traumatic events by numbing the emotions". Yes we definitely are.... I had no idea I had all that stuff in me...and i remember at first getting very hot ....and feeling like i was burning up inside and it was coming out....at first i felt like i was going to pass out....it was very scary....like i was going to die......it was all how i felt when i first experienced all the trauma in my childhood....it got better and more was revealed thru my recovery process....I am not sure if this was called parts work....i believe that if it gets us were we need to be ...and that is out of the drama....then its all good...and i was willing to try it....a few years ago....i went to an intensive workshop for the weekend....and the therapist said that shes been doing this for a long time...and has never witness anyone going back as far as i did into their trauma....that God i did it...its like emotional surgery....and i needed weeks to recovery from that....Sun  |
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Post by bklynrn on Jun 2, 2012 10:16:45 GMT -8
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Post by changedman on Jun 3, 2012 10:06:01 GMT -8
What therapy do you recommend for a first timer?
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Post by bklynrn on Jun 3, 2012 17:03:01 GMT -8
What are you looking to work on? Addiction? If yes, then seek out a therapist who specializes in trauma and addiction.
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Post by gypsysoul on Jun 5, 2012 20:07:14 GMT -8
Bklynrn....I've been in a "good place" the past couple of days and busy w/ relatives visiting (which is great for my mood) so I haven't been as active here of late but I wanted to take a moment to thank you for the links you posted for me...very thoughtful and kind of you to do so, and I found them helpful... It's amazing ...the power of the kindness of strangers |
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Post by bklynrn on Jun 6, 2012 2:50:57 GMT -8
Your welcome, gypsysoul |
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