Post by Deleted on Nov 23, 2017 11:30:59 GMT -8
It is SO easy to create 'fantasy bond' with PoA and ignore/dismiss reality. ...
... Thank goodness. Thank God. ...
If I had chosen POA... We would have children, but we would be caught up in the material world and the world of the flesh. We would be together, but we would probably hate one another. We would have spent decades competing and chasing one another within a loveless marriage. For her, marriage would not have been monogamous. I would not be focused on God. She, by her nature, could never be focused on me like I want, even if we were together every day.
She would have controlled and dominated my life and made me miserable. At least now, she is far away from me physically and I can be miserable in peace.
In my fantasy... We would have a big house in the affluent part of town. 3 or 4 children and large family gatherings of the extended families. We would both be professionals. If she had supported me emotionally when I first entered school, I would have a PhD and she, her JD. We would have gone to the same school and had the same alumni. We would have married in college and lived in the married housing on campus. We would have gone through that struggle poor phase where we both got established. We could have learned together, we are so smart and powerful when we are together. She would wear yellow sundresses at Easter, and pick up the boys from soccer practice. We would have pizza supper on Saturday nights... It's a good fantasy.