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Post by mermaids on Mar 24, 2014 19:03:30 GMT -8
Hello everyone,
I was just cleaning out my room today, and I came across some things that belonged to my PoA. We are not contacting each other (we haven't been for a couple weeks now) and it began to trigger some emotions. I felt really confused on what to do with his stuff and how to handle these re-surfaced emotions? I'm new and I'm still in the very beginning stages of recovery.
Thank you, Sarah
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Post by CodepNomore on Mar 24, 2014 21:01:32 GMT -8
Welcome Sarah,
Remove them from your sight, either by throwing them away or storing them far away from your sight.
Flush those thoughts and replace them with what you are discovering and learning about yourself such as your inner child(ren). Then your emotions will change as you change your focus and thoughts.
By the way, if it is not personal, may I ask why did you choose "mermaid" as your username here? What does mermaid symbolizes to you?
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Post by LovelyJune on Mar 25, 2014 6:06:21 GMT -8
Hi Sarah, I agree with codep. Remove them. Why hold on to something that triggers you? I know this may sound like overkill, but write out a list of how holding onto old stuff helps you to become more healthy and move on. Hopefully the list will be very short or non-existent! Deal with your emotions in healthier ways. Focus not on old memories, but how you can use this experience as a catalyst to a better YOU.
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Post by mermaids on Mar 25, 2014 7:17:42 GMT -8
Thank you so much. This has really helped me a lot. The mermaid symbolize freedom and love for me; finding it within myself. I was really inspired by the Alex and Ani bracelet. I chose it to be a reminder that I am freed of my addiction and it cannot control me, and that I love myself.
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Triggers
Mar 25, 2014 18:36:23 GMT -8
via mobile
Post by mermaids on Mar 25, 2014 18:36:23 GMT -8
Well, I first started NC on December 17th (before I knew I had an addiction problem). That lasted for 3 months and then he surprised me by visiting me on my birthday, which ended the NC. Then I decided in March 16th to continue to not contact him, because I felt there was still something off and suggested we both needed healing, me more than him.
It was really hard, because he was a really good friend to me, and very supportive. My feelings for him have almost completely disintegrated (sometime s there would be a small romantic thought here and there, but I've controlled it enough to say no to them).
I'm still working on myself, but I already feel like I have really improved by being here and reading everyone's stories and looking within myself.
Thank you so much, Sarah
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Post by CodepNomore on Mar 26, 2014 4:54:50 GMT -8
Oh so that's a very good choice of name.
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