Chrissy
Junior Member
Newcomer Greeter
Posts: 75
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Post by Chrissy on Dec 8, 2008 18:12:53 GMT -8
When you are really ready to stop managing or controlling the man in your life, this also means that you must stop encouraging and praising him Why? Because chances are you have used praise and encouragement to try to get to do what you'd like and therefore they must be numbered among your tools for manipulating him.
Praising and encouraging are very close to pushing and when you do that you are trying to control of his life. Think about why you are lauding something he's done. Is it to help help him raise his self esteem? That's manipulation. It is so that he'll know how proud you are of him? That can be a burden for him to carry. Let him develop his own accomplishments. Other wise you come dangerously close to play a mothering role with him. He doesn't need another mother ( no matter how bad his mother was!) and much more to the point, you don't need him to be your child.
[Save praising for God. Susan P][/center]
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