Post by Susan Peabody on Jul 22, 2023 11:39:40 GMT -8
In 12-Step programs we are asked to take a look at our shortcomings along with our strengths. It is important to do both. But how do we get in touch with a shortcoming that is buried deep in our unconscious? The answer is shadow projection.
Our shadow is a part of our personality that we are ashamed of and so we bury it. Sometimes we even forget it altogether. We almost always deny it before recovery.
When we meet someone and they trigger real anger, it is because we are projecting our shadow on to them. We see in them what we can't or won't see in ourselves. When we dislike someone within reason it is because we have a different set of values or behaviors than ours. But when we rage at someone, we are usually seeing something ourselves that we really dislike.
In recovery, I often find it hard to see my shadow, but by getting to know myself better I can acknowledge it. According to David Richo, the best way to handle our shadow is to befriend it. Embrace it rather than deny it. Then ask God to help you transform from a judgmental person to an understanding person.