Post by Susan Peabody on Feb 27, 2009 14:53:32 GMT -8
I have always been a perfectionist. I don’t know if I was born with a preprogrammed sense of order, or if I just wanted to be perfect to get my parents’ attention. I do know, however, that I have always been ruled by an inner mandate to do everything just right, and that this perfectionism eventually became a hindrance to my self-esteem. In other words, I could only feel good about myself if I could do something perfectly. Eventually, I came to realize that this attitude was a trap, because human beings cannot be perfect. We are perfectly imperfect. We always live in the shadow of perfection. I also began seeing my perfectionism as arrogant, as well as impossible, and I began to see how it eroded my relationships with others. Finally, I began to see the relationship between perfectionism and my obsession for control. To deal with this, I lowered my standards and decided to settle for being human. I started giving myself credit for things like showing up, doing my best, making progress, and so on. Giving up my all-or-nothing attitude boosted my self-esteem.