Post by chrissy on Mar 31, 2009 3:03:06 GMT -8
When an emotionally painful event occurs and we tell ourselves it is our fault, we are actually saying that we have control of it: if we change the pain will stop.
This dynamic is behind much of the self blame in women who love too much. By blaming ourselves, we hold on to the hpe that we will be able to figure out what we are doing wrong and then correct it, thereby controlling the situation and stopping the pain.
Our task is to face the situation, accept that is painful, let go of our illusion of control and ask for support and guidance from a Higher Will.
This dynamic is behind much of the self blame in women who love too much. By blaming ourselves, we hold on to the hpe that we will be able to figure out what we are doing wrong and then correct it, thereby controlling the situation and stopping the pain.
Our task is to face the situation, accept that is painful, let go of our illusion of control and ask for support and guidance from a Higher Will.