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Post by startingnew on Nov 19, 2010 5:13:11 GMT -8
Hello everyone, I am trying to find out exactly what a spouses role is in an addicts recovery?being on the other side of it and not having much communication, I feel as though all of my attempts are causing my wife to move further away from me. I love my wife and family more than life itself and want to be there for her, but she isnt ready to come to me just yet. From a person that has love addiction, what would you say would be the best thing your spouse/boyfriend/girlfriend etc. could have done to be supportive and helpful? Any help would be greatly appreciated.
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Post by lonely1 on Nov 19, 2010 13:54:45 GMT -8
> I feel as though all of my attempts . . .
The word "attempts", to me, sounds more like trying to convince, change, correct, calibrate someone else . . .that is not support . . .
If, and whenever, the W decides she wants out with the other AND she wants to be with with you . . .
. . .and you still want her . . .
then the support is in the form of forgiveness . . .
I do not beleive in "forgive and forget"; once I have an experience (brought on by me or someone else) it is in the 'mental photograph album' forever...it is my choice to not lookj at that page, howerver . . .but the photo is always there....
But I do 'forgive' . .I too am human, and subject to the same foibles as anyone else...to not forgive would be hypocritical (well, that's how I am...)
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